It’s been a while…legit almost an entire month. When I started my blog, I promised myself consistency. I wanted to make sure I was holding myself accountable to writing each week, and for 19 straight weeks, I did…multiple times a week in fact. As I started to approach the new cycle of our season, I knew it was important for me to take some time away. Away from work, family, all of the responsibilities of “life”. In fact as soon as the season ended I was on a hunt for a 48 hour solo recharge trip. I knew I needed water, and I wanted somewhere with easy access by flight. It took me a couple of weeks, but I found the perfect spot for me, and the days leading into the draft, I set off on my first solo trip.
I don’t want 48 uninterrupted hours, I want a lifetime.”
– Dr. McDreamy (Grey’s Anatomy
I distinctly remember this quote from back when I was obsessed with Greys. I’m still a fan, as with all things Shonda Rhymes. This quote was in regard to McDreamy professing his love for Meredith Grey but the 48 uninterrupted hours is something that has always struck a cord with me. Maybe it’s because as a mom, that honestly does not exist. Being a mother is a 24/7 role. You don’t get breaks, don’t have the opportunity to be sick…you basically are always “on.”
As I mentioned before, I knew that my one main desire this off season was to find 48 hours for ME. I expressed my needs (not desires) to my partner and I was determined to make it work. I searched and prayed, and I located a quaint international space that was near and dear to my heart. I booked the flight. Grabbed a snazzy hotel that allowed me direct beach access. Packed my one [very] small bag (because who needs a bunch of stuff when the plan is to do nothing). I didn’t want to be bothered and wanted to partake in the art of doing nothing. Shoutout to movie Eat, Pray, Love for the quote – “La Dolce Far Niente” – the sweetness of doing nothing.
I was strategic in choosing my dates as my summer schedule was about to be in full force (hence my month long absence). We had home support for the littles, and I could go away without guilt, and truly focus on me.
In my 48 hours I read an entire book because I wanted to [re: check out “Conquering Kilimanjaro” by my very good friend, Jodi Greve]. It provided me with the reminder that all great things I’ve learned in sport and regardless of how many mountains are in front of me, they are all conquerable with the right support, dedication, and grace that I give to myself. I laid on the beach. Asked myself what else I wanted to do, and laid there for 3 more hours while listening to worship music. I walked the resort. I woke up early because I was refreshed from a solid nights rest. I listened to the dolphins talk to each other at night before bed. I prayed. I dreamed. I felt an immense amount of gratitude to have the financial resources, family support to do such a thing, the mental wherewithal to know how much I needed it, and the ability to follow through.
I left feeling grateful and blessed. Oh…and tanned. A very nice tan. One day I might be able to fully unplug, but one step at a time. I know for sure this is a standard I’m now adding to my self care. Even if it means a 2 day staycation in a local hotel. Sometimes we just need to pause. We need to regroup. We need to recharge our batteries. The last 12 months have challenged me in a variety of ways, but what I have learned is I don’t have to be everything for everyone. I can be vulnerable in how I truly feel. I also learned to give myself plenty of grace. When my batteries are drained, I can now step away to recharge because I’m not only doing others a disservice but also myself when I’m operating below normal.
So take the trip/read a book/take a nap – indulge in whatever self care looks like to you. Recharge your heart and mind. You deserve it. The world will [and can] wait. We will all be better for it.